Job Hunting Tips…How to Completely Screw Them Up
With the unemployment rate hovering near the double digits, tens of thousands of Americans are in need of new jobs to cover their expenses and survive today’s cutthroat jobs market.
With no monthly income and the rising costs of utilities job-seekers everywhere are in a desperate search to get hired. Unfortunately, getting a job in this kind of environment is tough for many of us. While it is quite easy to search blogs and advice columns for tips on how to get hired, we have opted to take the alternate route and let you in on some of the best ways for you to avoid landing a job.
1. Know the Good and the Bad About the Company
While most job hunting tips will naturally advise you to spend a lot of time researching the history and profile of the company you are applying to, why not try taking a stab at the information they would rather you know nothing about? Dig a bit deeper and dwell more on your future company’s dirty laundry. If you can sneak your way around their office, it’s a great idea to find out who will be interviewing you in advance. Once you have their name, go incognito and investigate into their family life, hobbies, past jobs and any other useful information you can get your hands on.
2. Creating the Imperfect First Impression
As they say, first impressions last a long time, which is why many job-seekers dress to the nines to win over their potential bosses. Instead of looking like the boring IT guy next door, why not fire it up and catch their attention by either under-dressing or over-dressing. In a job interview, it is always important to look interesting, and if that means putting on your grandmother’s old night gown, then by all means, go for it!
3. Arrive Early…Way Too Early
Any sane person would tell you to come to your interview at least 15 minutes ahead of time. Of course, you get brownie points for doing this, but as you are in a frantic search for a job, you need to do more than just that. Our advice is that you get into the interviewer’s office earlier than anyone else has to be. Instead of showing up a couple of minutes early, why not surprise your future boss by being there even before they show up for work?
4. Let Them Know Exactly What You Want
Perhaps one of the biggest lies made in job interviews across the globe is, “I am not here for the money, only for the job”. What a big fat lie! Anybody in their right mind would of course apply for a job for the sole purpose of getting paid. If you want to take the “holier art thou” route, go ahead, but for us, we recommend that you tell your future boss exactly what you need, a big fat paycheck that you haven’t even earned.
You’re not going to get hired by any means following these tips, but if it doesn’t get their attention, then I don’t know what else will!
If your goal is to grossly underwhelm at your next interview, make sure to avoid getting a diploma from one of these respected online accounting degree programs. Why compare accounting associates degrees that could lead to a real job when your mom will let you live at home well into your 30s.




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